Refleksi Diri

Barusan nemu sebuah tulisan di buku catatan saya. Ditulis sekitar 9 bulan yang lalu.

"I hate my self for almost always getting up late
I hate my self for being unconfident
I hate my self for being irresponsible
I hate my self for being easily bored
I hate my self for not having spirits to fight and struggle
I hate my self for leaving my obligation esp. sholat
I hate the fact that I haven't found any real-friend or intimate friend (Setidaknya sekarang InsyaAllah sudah menemukan)
I hate my self for not feeling comfort in doing du'a
I hate my self for always finding more negative sides than positive sides
I hate my self for not having willing to change seriously

But I love my self for being happy in helping others."

Ternyata selama 9 bulan itu hampir seluruh bagian I hate my self masih belum berubah kecuali tentang teman. Jadi selama ini saya ngapain?


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